Showing posts with label Halloween Jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Halloween Jokes. Show all posts

Halloween Jokes for Kids 2018

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 Halloween Jokes for Kids: Best Funny Jokes for Halloween for Children


Halloween Jokes for Kids 2018
Halloween Jokes for Kids 2018


Here is a collection of funny Halloween jokes for kids. (OK, a lot of these Halloween one-liners and jokes aren’t actually funny to me. But since everyone has a different sense of humor, we’ll let you decide if they are funny to you. :

FUNNY AND CORNY HALLOWEEN JOKES FOR KIDS





Why did the vampire go to the orthodontist?


To improve his bite…


What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?

Frostbite…

Why do witches use brooms to fly on?

Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy…

How do witches keep their hair in place while flying?

With scare spray…

What do you get when you cross a werewolf and a vampire?


A fur coat that fangs around your neck…


Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?


No, they eat the fingers separately…


Why don’t skeletons ever go out on the town?


Because they don’t have any body to go out with…

What do ghosts add to their morning cereal?

Booberries…

What is a vampire’s favorite sport?


Casketball…

What is a vampire’s favorite holiday?

Fangsgiving…


What would a monster’s psychiatrist be called?

Shrinkenstein…

What did one ghost say to the other ghost?

“Do you believe in people?”

What do you call someone who puts poison in a person’s corn flakes?


A cereal killer…

Why do mummies have trouble keeping friends?







They’re so wrapped up in themselves…



















What kind of streets do zombies like the best?







Dead ends…



















What does the papa ghost say to his family when driving?







Fasten your sheet belts…



















What is a vampire’s favorite mode of transportation?







A blood vessel…



















What is a ghost’s favorite mode of transportation?







A scareplane…



















What type of dog do vampire’s like the best?







Bloodhounds…



















What is a ghoul’s favorite flavor?







Lemon-slime…



















What does a vampire never order at a restaurant?







A stake sandwich…



















What is a skeleton’s favorite musical instrument?







A trombone…



















What do birds give out on Halloween night?







Tweets…



















Why do vampires need mouthwash?







They have bat breath…



















What’s a vampire’s favorite fast food?







A guy with very high blood pressure…



















Why did the Vampire subscribe to the Wall Street Journal?







He heard it had great circulation…



















Why don’t angry witches ride their brooms?







They’re afraid of flying off the handle



















Who won the skeleton beauty contest?







No body



















What do skeletons say before they begin dining?







Bone appetit !



















Where do baby ghosts go during the day?







Dayscare centers



















Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?







His ghoul friend



















What’s a monster’s favorite play?







Romeo and Ghouliet



















What do witches put on their hair?







Scare spray



















What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?







Bamboo



















What kind of mistakes do spooks make?







Boo boos



















What kind of cereal do monsters eat?







Ghost-Toasties



















What has webbed feet, feathers, fangs and goes quack-quack?







Count Duckula



















What does Tweety Bird say on Halloween?







Twick or Tweet



















Where do spooks water ski?







On Lake Erie



















What happened to the guy who didn’t pay his exorcist?







He was repossessed



















What does a ghost eat for lunch?







A BOO-logna sandwich



















Where do mummies go for a swim?







To the dead sea



















What’s the ratio of a pumpkin’s circumference to its diameter?







Pumpkin Pi



















Where do ghosts buy their food?







At the ghost-ery store



















Where do ghosts mail their letters?







At the ghost office



















What’s a ghosts favorite ride at the carnival?







The roller ghoster



















How do you mend a broken Jack-o-lantern?







With a pumpkin patch



















When does a skeleton laugh?







When something tickles his funny bone



















Why was the mummy so tense?







He was all wound up



















Where did the goblin throw the football?







Over the ghoul line



















What does a skeleton orders at a restaurant?







Spare ribs



















What do goblins mail home while on vacation?







Ghostcards



















What is a ghost’s favorite party game?







Hide-and-go-shriek



















What do baby ghosts wear on their feet?







Boo-ties!



















What did the boy ghost say to the girl ghost?







You look boo-tiful tonight



















What is a ghost favorite article of clothing?







Boojeans



















What does a ghost put on his cereal in the morning?







Boonanas and Booberries



















What kind of roads do ghosts haunt?







Dead Ends



















Who did the ghost invite to his party?







Anyone he could dig up!



















What is a monster’s favorite food?







Ghoul scout cookies



















What did the skeleton say while riding his Harley Davidson motorcycle?







I’m bone to be wild!



















Why does Dracula consider himself a good artist?







Because he likes to draw blood!



















When do gholes cook their victims?







On Fry Day



















What’s a vampire’s favorite candy?







A sucker



















What do you call a ghost with a broken leg?







Hoblin Goblin



















What do goblins and ghosts drink when they’re hot and thirsty on Halloween?







Ghoul-aid!!!



















When does a ghost have breakfast?







In the moaning.



















What do ghosts drink at breakfast?







Coffee with scream and sugar.



















What do you call a witch who lives at the beach?







A sand-witch



















What do ghosts eat for dinner?







Spookgetti



















What’s a ghosts favorite fruit?







Booberries.



















What’s a ghosts favorite desert?







Boo-berry pie.



















Why do girl ghosts go on diets?







So they can keep their ghoulish figures.







More Than 200 Halloween Jokes 2018

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Halloween Jokes 2018


Halloween Jokes 2018

Halloween Jokes 2018



Some of these jokes are very 'bat' some might even say it is 'scary'. :-) There are more Halloween jokes here.

Q. What do goblins and ghosts drink when they're hot and thirsty on Halloween? A. Ghoul-aid!!!

Q. What is a Mummie's favorite type of music? A. Wrap!!!!!

Q. Why do demons and ghouls hang out together? A. Because demons are a ghouls best friend!

Q. What's a monster's favorite bean? A. A human bean.

Q. Why can't the boy ghost have babies? A. Because he has a Hallo-weenie.

Q. What do you call a witch who lives at the beach? A. A sand-witch.

Q. Where does a ghost go on Saturday night? A. Anywhere where he can boo-gie.

Q. What did the skeleton say to the vampire? A. You suck.

Q. What do ghosts say when something is really neat? A.Ghoul

Q. Why did the ghost go into the bar? A. For the Boos.

Q. Why was the girl afraid of the vampire? A. He was all bite and no bark.

Q. Why did the game warden arrest the ghost? A. He didn't have a haunting license.

Q. Why didn't the skeleton dance at the party? A. He had no body to dance with.

Q. Where does Count Dracula usually eat his lunch? A. At the casketeria.

Q. What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog? A. He is mist.

Q. Where did the goblin throw the football? A. Over the ghoul line.

Q. Why doesn't Dracula mind the doctor looking at his throat. A. Because of the coffin.

Q. Why is a ghost such a messy eater? A. Because he is always a goblin.

Q. What do you call a goblin who gets too close to a bonfire? A. A toasty ghosty.

Q. Why did the Vampire read the Wall Street Journal? Q. He heard it had great circulation.

Q. What tops off a ghost's ice cream sundae? A. Whipped scream.

Q. What do you give a skeleton for valentine's day? A. Bone-bones in a heart shaped box.

Q. What are ghosts' favorite kind of streets? A. Dead ends

Q. What is a vampires favorite holiday? A. Fangsgiving

Q. What kind of makeup do ghosts wear? A. Mas-scare-a.


Funny Halloween Jokes and Riddles For Kids

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Halloween Season is here, so here are is our ever-growing list of funny Halloween Jokes and Riddles for kids...and you!

Halloween Jokes For Kids
Halloween Jokes For Kids




  • What day of the week do Halloween Monsters eat their Candy?
  • On Chewsday!

  • Which Halloween Characters eats the quickest?
  • The Goblin.

  • Why are graveyards so noisy?
  • Because of all the coffin!

  • Why is Halloween so fun for Ghouls?
  • Because Halloween is a Ghoul's Best Friend.

  • Why are skeletons so calm, cool and collected?
  • Because nothing gets under their skin.

  • What breed of horse does the Boogie Man ride?
  • Night Mares.

  • What's the only music a Halloween Mummy listens to?
  • Wrap Music.


  • Why did the Vampire keep falling for the oldest tricks in the book?
  • Because he's a sucker!

  • What's the best game to play at Halloween?
  • Hide and Shriek!

  • Why aren't Skeletons Stunt Men?
  • They don't have the guts!

  • What do you get if you cross a bat with a bag of chips?
  • Snacks that go crunch in the night!

  • How does a Witch tell time?
  • With her Witch Watch!

  • What do ghouls do at garage sales?
  • They go bargain Haunting.

  • What do Wizards love about their computers?
  • The Spell checker!

  • Why did the Witch put her broom in the washing machine?
  • She wanted a clean sweep!

  • What sound does a Witch's cereal make?
  • Snap, Cackle, and Pop!

  • How do you know someone is a Redneck?
  • His Pumpkin has more teeth than his wife.

    Halloween Jokes 2018

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    Halloween Jokes 2108

    Halloween Jokes 2108

    Halloween Jokes 2108



    Short Halloween Jokes


    Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road?
    It had no guts...

    How do witches keep their hair in place while flying?
    With scare spray...

    What did Dracula say when he kissed his vampire girlfriend?
    Ouch...

    How do monsters tell their future?
    They read their horrorscope...

    What do you get when you cross a werewolf and a vampire?
    A fur coat that fangs around your neck...

    Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
    No, they eat the fingers separately...

    Why don't skeletons ever go out on the town?
    Because they don't have any body to go out with...

    What do ghosts add to their morning cereal?
    Booberries...

    What do zombies like to eat at a cook out?
    Halloweenies...

    What is a vampire's favorite sport?
    Casketball...

    What is a vampire's favorite holiday?
    Fangsgiving...

    Why did the vampire go to the orthodontist?
    To improve his bite...

    What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
    Frostbite...

    What does a ghost get when he falls and scrapes his knee?
    A boo boo...

    Why do witches use brooms to fly on?
    Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy...

    What is Dracula's favorite kind of coffee?
    Decoffinated...

    What would a monster's psychiatrist be called?
    Shrinkenstein...

    What is a baby ghost's favorite game?
    Peekaboo...

    What did one ghost say to the other ghost?
    "Do you believe in people?"

    What do you call someone who puts poison in a person's corn flakes?
    A cereal killer...

    Why do mummies have trouble keeping friends?
    They're too wrapped up in themselves...

    What kind of streets do zombies like the best?
    Dead ends...

    What does the papa ghost say to his family when driving?
    Fasten your sheet belts...

    What do ghouls eat for breakfast?
    Ghost toasties with evaporated milk.

    What is a vampire's favorite mode of transportation?
    A blood vessel...

    What is a ghost's favorite mode of transportation?
    A scareplane...

    What type of dog do vampire's like the best?
    Bloodhounds...

    What is a ghoul's favorite flavor?
    Lemon-slime...

    What does a vampire never order at a restaurant?
    A stake sandwich...

    What is a skeleton's favorite musical instrument?
    A trombone...

    What do birds give out on Halloween night?
    Tweets...

    Why do vampires need mouthwash?
    They have bat breath...

    What's a vampire's favorite fast food?
    A guy with very high blood pressure...

    Why did the Vampire subscribe to the Wall Street Journal?
    He heard it had great circulation...

    Why did the dyslexic vampire starve to death?
    He couldn't find any dloob...

    Did you hear about the cannibal boy that was 8 before he was 7?
    hehehehe...

    Did you hear about the cannibal who was expelled from school?
    He was buttering up his teacher...

    What does a cannibal get when he comes home late for dinner?
    The cold shoulder...

    Did you hear about the cannibal that passed his mother-in-law in the jungle?
    hee hee...

    What do you get when you goose a ghost?
    A handful of sheet...

    What kind of car does a ghost drive?
    A Boo-ick...

    What did the mother ghost say to her son?
    Don't spook unless you are spooken to...

    What do ghosts use to wash their hair?
    Sham-boo...

    Why did the ghost pick his nose?
    Because he had boogers...

    What kind of pants do ghosts wear?
    Boojeans...